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kari_izumi in wtffanfiction

Move over My Immortal, there's a new horrid Sue in fandom!

Title: imma Wiserd (spelled exactly as written.)
Fandom: Harry Potter
Rating:T/ PG 13
Pairings: Head/Desk

I think it's safe to say it's a troll. Although nothing can replace the hilarious badness of My Immortal, this one might come close with it's racism, spelling that would make your English teacher shit bricks, and a lack of anything resembling Harry Potter. The Stu is supposed to be a black kid that can do everything better than Harry (who is also black, but, as we find out, was turned white in the movies to make more money *roll eyes*), including play bromstiks.

I'd attempt a summary, but I wouldn't know where to begin.
note 2 da reedars: neva beliv any1 hu sayz a blak man dont like fired chickin
I reckon there are plenty of fired chickin in this economy.

da next day me an hary went doun 2 da big kitchin where all da chillin were chillin :)

Wow, I wonder how many seconds it took to come up with that brilliant pun?

i went up but wen i wuz abutt to get it a guy in a big blak cap came in on his brommsticks. he poented his wond at me "die". i den fel off mah bromstik. "ahhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!111111111" i sed.

"turtle!!!!!11111" sed herman. (NOTE: "herman" = Hermione in case you got lost with the bad spelling--not that I'd blame you) da ppl scremd when i wuz fallin. it hit da grund. then i died.
Oh yeah, I forgot to mention: Turtle has the power of Lazerus, and this is far from the last time he will "die."

While most of the chapters are fairly short, the fic excels at snarking itself--black guards distracted by fired chickens at the Unemployment line, Snape being a Jew who hates black people, including his black twin, Magic Johnson as the DADA teacher (because he's not call "Magic" for nothing! HAHAHA GET IT?!), and even God instructing our Sue to killed the Jew that killed his only son.

...yeah. It'd the rare badfic that anyone who isn't a fan of the series will go O_o at.

X-posted to badfic_quotes .